I have received a heartfelt but hypothetical cri de couer from Glasgow Paul. He would clearly be a troubled man if it were true.
I will leave him to tell you his tale. Something about it seems vaguely familiar…
Let us assume for a minute that I am a petty thief. I have a record for various offences and have been punished on several occasions for my crimes.
It now turns out that I am being accused of murder year after year for about the last ten years! I have a lot of friends however whose income is dependent on me remaining at large. I also bring a lot of income to the country as I and my friends spend a lot of money travelling around from July to May each year.
Now nobody of any authority is saying I am guilty yet, but the cops have handed a report to the procurator fiscal as they feel there is a case to answer. This has been passed to Crown Office to frame the petition for my arrest.
My landlord wants me to stay in my flat as the local/national economy relies on me and I have promised to mend my ways! He does insist however that I attend court to defend myself against the murder charges, for which I am adamant that I am not guilty.
Everyone is waiting to see what I will do.
I have told the landlord that I will not return to the flat unless the prosecution drop all the charges but he is insisting that I must answer to them. What a horrible man he is and I bet it is his pal the upright taxpayer friend of his that has it in for me.
Just because I stole possessions of his a lot over the last ten years! He is just bitter – how dare he.
They’ve all got it in for me!
Haven’t I been punished enough already! I mean I’ve been on remand since February and I lost the Bentley. I’ve got to drive around in a bloody Mercedes now!
I know they think I committed murder, but i didn’t – honest.
And by the way, I will definitely not accept life in prison for murder, oh no, in fact I left the meeting with my landlord out of principle. I didn’t do it, but if I’m found guilty there’s no way I’ll accept life, it’s far too severe, haven’t I been punished enough already, I mean I can’t steal again until next August, the Mercedes won’t get me to Europe and I can’t buy a new Bentley for the next three years.
I can only shoplift penny chews for the next three years, haven’t I been punished enough, come on haven’t I been punished enough?
I didn’t do it, it was my crime boss what did it and I’m taking the fall for him, haven’t I already been punished enough, some people want to kick me just because I’m down, it’s not like I stole from them, ahem, I’m going straight now honest, I’ve been punished a lot already did I mention?
I hope you all go bust.
By the way I’m not sorry!
Posted by Glasgow Paul